Long Road....

Well I think I jinxed myself last week by saying things were uneventful. This week was the exact opposite.   On Tuesday Andrew started having lots of Bradys (this means his heart slows down). Normally he has two or three a day. Tuesday he had over 20. On Wednesday he started going Apnic (this means he stops breathing). Wednesday night they decided to inti bate him because he could no longer breath on his own. So now he has a breathing tube in his throat that goes into his lungs that breathes for him. It was heart wrenching on Tuesday and Wednesday to see him struggling so much. As much as I didn't want him inti bated it is good to see him rest and not have to work so hard. The doctors aren't sure why this happening. We had a ton of tests done and they are tossing around a few things that really scare me like meningitis. We are praying it isn't something like that.  I had a few moments this week where I thought I was going to crumble and break. It is amazing when you think you absolutely can't take anymore you somehow make it through another day. We were so excited to get into the 3lbs area because it meant we could dress him and get him into a crib. That all seems so silly now. I just want him to breath at this point. I try to hold onto the positive things he is doing (like gaining weight) and remind myself I have to stay strong for him.

On a happy note my blog gives me stats on the number of people that come to this web address. It stated I had over 6,000 hits since May. That is amazing to me. I really appreciate all the people who take the time out of their busy day to read about what is going on. Also thanks for the comments. I love reading them and they never fail to make me feel better! Thank you so so so much!!!
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I love his little chicken legs and feet! 

34 wks and 7 wks old

Hi!

This blog is going to be short because this last week has been pretty uneventful which in our world is a great thing. Andrew is really getting bigger! He weighs over 3.5 lbs. Normally at this point they would have us try to dress him and see if he can maintain his own temperature. If he can then he gets to go into a crib. I'm so excited for that day to come! Unfortunately because of his breathing issues we have to hold off until it is under control. We just have to wait and let him tell us when he is ready to start breathing more independently.

The picture below is from yesterday. We gave him a sponge bath and changed out his feeding tube and tape on his face. It is the first picture except for when he was born that we have without anything on his face. We were very excited to see him!

I hope everyone is having a great week!

Guess who weighs 3 pounds

Andrew hit the big 3 lbs a few days ago! We are so happy to get out of the 2 lbs area. I think it is a mental thing. 2 lbs just sounds bad. 3 lbs sounds tough and durable…haha. I was so happy for his weight gain but we have had some real breathing challenges. For the first time since Andrew was born my husband and I ventured out of a 10 mile radius from the hospital. One of us is always with him or near by. Well we thought he is starting to get a little bigger so it won't hurt to visit some family that lives a half hour away. Boy were we wrong!! We had such a great evening and our first home cooked meal in a long time. My husband and I looked at each other when we got in the car and said it was so nice to have a relaxing time. I swear two minutes after we said that the phone rings and it is the hospital. They said Andrew stopped breathing 7 times and needed to be resuscitated twice. We just got a brand new SUV that I'm still learning how to maneuver because I'm very petite and it feels huge. I floor it and try to get back as soon as possible while trying not to kill us. The whole thing was so crazy. They gave Andrew a blood transfusion and went back to the breathing device he had when he was first born. The docs think he just needs some time to mature his lungs. Needless to say we won't be leaving the hospital area for a long time to come! Our hearts always stop when we see the hospital’s number pop up on our cell phones. They never call with good news. So even when we aren’t at the hospital we are staring at our phone praying for it not to ring. You just always feel like you are on edge. You can never relax and if you start to something will pull you back in. I needed to give myself a little pep talk yesterday to get my spirits back up and to keep looking at the big picture. I know we won’t be in this place forever. At some point I will be able to walk with my little guy outside in his stroller.


Ryan Seacrest and Selena Gomez were at the hospital today. It was the cutest thing to see all the kids being wheeled out of their rooms and into the atrium with a team of nurses/docs behind them. A little girl got an autograph and she was screaming how it was the best day of her life. Seeing all the joy on the kids’ faces was amazing! The nurses were saying Ryan and Selena would answer some of the call bells for the really sick kids that couldn’t leave their rooms. Imagine thinking the nurse was going to walk in and in walks Ryan Seacrest. 

Looking at Dad 

Andrew's Temporary Home 

(32 weeks old) and (1 month and 1 week old)

This week is a big milestone. When I was pregnant and after I had my surgery I kept saying to myself if I can only make it to 32 weeks we will be in the clear for a lot of preemie issues. So here we are at 32 weeks. It isn't the way I wanted to get here but I wouldn't trade it either. I got to spend more time holding and seeing him so who can be upset about that. This week we have been allowed to hold him a lot more. I hold him in the morning and my husband holds him in the evening. The way we hold him is called kangerooing or skin to skin. It is to keep him warm since he can't regulate his own body temperature. I think even when he can regulate it I will still hold him like that sometimes. I love it! 

This week has been mostly good. He has been on his full feeds so he is slowly gaining weight. I'm hoping he will hit 3 lbs soon. It is such a slow process. One day he will gain and the next lose.  I wish I could feed him Big Macs...haha. We did have a set back with his breathing. We have been switching back and forth on different breathing devices to help him. I think the bigger he gets the faster we will get out of the woods with the lung and heart stuff we are dealing with. 

As much as I'm getting used to my life in Philly I spend a lot of time daydreaming about getting out of here. The things I'm looking forward to the most are seeing my dogs again, having my own stuff like bed and kitchen, baking and being a normal mom with Andrew. This week we finally started buying some baby stuff.  I'm really excited about a stroller we bought that converts to a jogging stroller. I love running and before I got pregnant I would see moms out running with their babies. I couldn't wait to do that. We are moving to Colorado after all of this is over (my husband is in the military) and I'm sure there are many great trails to run. Lots of things to look forward to! 

I hope everyone is having a great week! 

                                 Our guy without the mask on his face! 

One Month Old!

Another week down! Andrew is one month old. Even though he still is right around 2 1/2 pounds he looks so much bigger to me. I realized one of the positives of the NICU. When will I ever get the chance to sit and stare at my baby grow in front of my eyes? When you are home with a baby you have other things going on. At the NICU you are sitting in front of his incubator staring in with no other distractions. I know every little change that goes on with him. As crappy as some of this situation is I definitely won't take for granted this time I get to spend with him. It has been really great seeing him turn into a baby. That sounds weird but for the first few weeks he had a face only a mother could love. In fact I called him little Benjamin Button. He looked exactly like Brad Pitt when he was the "old man baby".  He is starting to get eyebrows and eyelashes. He opens his eyes and his skin is fitting his body better.  Now I swear he is the cutest baby that has ever been born.

Andrew had a pretty good week overall. There were some downs but as they say here it is all part of the NICU. If I hear "Two steps forward and one step back" one more time I may scream. I think once we get out of this two pound area and he hits three pounds he will be stronger and not have as many issues. At least in my humble medical opinion.

One of the nice things the NICU does is have some group things for the moms to do. For example every Thursday at 2:00 they have scrap booking in the conference room. I have been able to make some really great new friends. Being surrounded by families at the NICU and the Ronald McDonald house makes you feel like what your going through is normal because everybody else is too. If it wasn't for that I don't think I would handle this as well. Of course my husband is my strength and rock so he keeps me going too.

Our little guy!